Bro. George Ghiselli got this by e-mail from a friend, and forwarded it to me. It explains the differences among today's leading operating systems. I did some editing. C'mon, Brother, get serious...

IF OPERATING SYSTEMS RAN THE AIRLINES

UNIX Airways

Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the airport. They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by piece, arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to be building. If they get that done, it works fine.

Air DOS

Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and let the plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push, jump on, coast again, and so on ...

Mac Airlines

All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents smile, look and act exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details, you are gently but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want to know, and everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so just strap in and shut up.

Windows 98 Air

The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy baggage check and boarding, and a smooth take-off. After about 10 minutes in the air, the plane explodes with no warning.

Windows XP Air

Just like Windows Air, but costs more, and uses much bigger planes. Some of these tow other planes. You will probably have to wait a few hours for the explosion.

Linux Air

Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start their own airline. They build the planes themselves. Somewhat like UNIX Airways, passengers pitch in. The airline charges a small fee to cover the cost of printing the ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself. When you board the plane, you get a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a copy of the seat-HOWTO.html. Passengers with  seats uninstalled by take-off time are bumped off, but their tickets are still good for the next flight.

Once settled, the fully adjustable seats are very comfortable; the plane leaves and arrives without a single problem; the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell customers of the other airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is, "You had to do what with the seat?"

The operating system (OS) is a set of programs that the computer uses to run your applications. The OS also manages your disks, your modem, your monitor, and all your other hardware. It keeps any program from messing up the memory reserved for the other programs. A network operating system (NOS) can run a whole network, or join one.

Some flavors: